I’m Hairy | Because You Cared

Because you cared….

I’m hairy.

My mom likes to say that I’m really a monkey and she stole me from my beloved family of banana eaters. This would explain my hobbit feet and my abnormal love for bananas, but unfortunately the truth is that I’m just a hairy human.

 When I shave my legs or under arm hair the new hair growth starts to visibly show within a day.

My eyebrows don’t understand the concept of “keep your hands to yourself” so naturally the concept of “keep your hairs to yourself” doesn’t sit well with them.

My toes have cat whiskers and there’s a trail of midnight bread crumbs around my navel leading down to my vaginal area for Hansel and Gretel.

I’d like for my hair to grow to my bra strap but I think if I give the hair on my chin only a couple of weeks it will be able to hug my toe whiskers.

So what’s a girl to do?

Flip her hair and keep it moving like a model on a runway.

I’m so done with obsessing over my body hair.

I’m not saying I love it and that I’m going to never shave or wax it but I am saying that I’m comfortable with it.

I’m not ashamed of walking out in a pair of shorts with a light layer of hair on my legs as long as my legs don’t look like their shouting for lotion.

If I just happen to wear a sleeveless shirt out to play a game of volleyball but forgot to shave my underarms, I’m not going to sit out of the game because of embarrassment.

There’s nothing to be embarrassed about. It’s hair. It’s normal. It’s perfect.

I’m not okay with this whole image of females having to have baby, smooth skin 25/8.

I don’t think that should be the norm. Women should feel just as free to shave or not to shave their body hair as men are.

Some women, like me, actually are just naturally hairy and it’s not okay to promote ideas that tell them that their body hair needs to be removed in order to be beautiful.
There’s so many things on a woman’s beauty check list:
              Must Have Good Looking Hair (on head or eyebrows because your value is only your hair)
               Must Get Rid of Any Other Hair (because grown men still don’t like the crust on their bread,  you’ve got to make things easy and smooth for men because God forbid they do anything difficult).
               Must Wear Makeup (because your face is ugly without it. men won’t notice but you’ll know that they don’t know how beautiful you look only when you’re wearing makeup)
                Must Be Thin (but not too thin because men need something to grab, but not too much because again they’ll have to work a bit harder to get around those curves)
Of course I feel this way partly because I’m too lazy to actually get up and shave my legs sometimes but regardless of my own lazy attitudes, it’s still oppressive to have such a common thought in our culture.

What’s the point of pubic hair? Why is it there?

I don’t think there is anything bad about pubic hair or leg hair or arm hair or hair. If it’s growing there it’s probably not to harm me.

I’ll shave or wax because I choose not to be lazy. I’ll do it because I might just prefer the look of being a little bit more bare. Yet I won’t do it because I’m in agreement with the idea that body hair is not beautiful unless its on your head.

 I refuse to shave or wax because I’m suppose to be some man’s slip and slide. No, if a man wants something smooth to lay his face on he can go cop a silk pillow case for about $25 on Amazon and he can slip his penis right on through and not have to hear my mouth.

And that’s all I have to say, because….you know, you cared.


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